MOVED!

Hi to all of you lovely readers! I just wanted to let you know that I have officially moved over to my new site: Minimalist Mommi Thus, if you're an e-mail subscriber or have me in your reader, could you possibly add the new site if it's not too much trouble? Thank you! Can't wait to see you all over there!

Nudity for Minimalism

I'm sure it's pretty apparent now that I hate stuff. And baby stuff is particularly cumbersome. How do I avoid some of it?

Nudity.

And just how has nudity saved us space and money? Let me count the ways!

1. When the boys eat, they generally do so shirt-less at home. This way, I avoid bibs. Also, I avoid stains on clothes--meaning we don't have to have a "junk" set of clothes and "nice" set of clothes.

2. Painting time is big in our household. If it's warm enough outside, the boys are au naturale with a paint brush in hand. Again, this spares clothes from getting stained. When done outside, I can just hose everything off--children included. Creativity can be added to the list of pro-nudity as the boys enjoy body painting. "Look! Blue's Clues!" You can REALLY turn into anything...

3. Early potty training rocks. Some people call this the schmancy "elimination communication." I call this the "I'm sick of buying/washing diapers, so on the potty you go." If we didn't allow the boys to go "nudey booty" from really early ages, I doubt both would be potty-trained as early as they were. Noah was day & night trained right at two. K-man is 19 months and mostly day time trained (at home he goes on the big potty with no help--awesome for my lazy self). I'm just so grateful that we are almost done with diapers of any kind. Plus, underwear takes up so much less space, less pairs are needed, and cost is lower. And when they're bare-butted, you don't have to worry about them getting the undies off in time.

4. An analogy of sorts, nudity is. If you take things down to the bare bones, it's often easier to find happiness. Such can be the case with physical nudity. When nude, they are as free as can be. They can enjoy the true innocence that is childhood without all of the superfluous in the way. Frankly, sometimes clothes and shoes just get in the way. A shirt snagged on a branch. A shoe with no traction slips on water. This is not to say that clothes aren't helpful at times too, but at-home nudity can eliminate the need for extra sets of clothes. And kids can be kids without the worry of ruining anything or feeling held back. Just go--that's all they need to do at this age.

Less clothing. Reduced diapering stage. Stubborn stains avoided. Uninhibited childhood joy. All brought to you by moseying around the way you came out. Granted, nudity isn't right in every situation, but it can help with the at home necessities.

So let that baby loose and revel in the short amount of time allotted for culturally accepted at-home nudity! And get yourself a margarita with the added time since you have just reduced your laundry duties. You'll probably need it since you're now yelling "LEAVE THAT THING ALONE!" Maybe that extra load of laundry was worth it after all.

The Lie We Believe

As parents, we want the best for our children. One area all parents are in agreement on is education. I'm sure we can all say that we want our children to get the best education humanly possible. Ok, well our ideas of what the "best" education entails is up for debate, but at the end of the day, we all want our kids to have all the educational opportunities possible.

What a better way to start their education than at home! As much as I agree with this statement, I think companies have taken advantage of parents' helicopter-ness when it comes to education. Buy this! It will increase fine motor skills. You need Y, so your child will develop a healthy imagination and better problem solving skills. Well, we all need well-rounded children. How could we deprive our children of an object that will enhance their intelligence? So we buy and buy and buy some more until our house looks like a preschool or children's museum. The kid just won't turn out right if we don't give them every opportunity for growth possible!

Like most I know, I completely bought into that idea--that our children must have these items to grow up appropriately. Even in my first post about what we own child-wise, I discuss that I keep items under the guise of it being "educational." Through this whole process of practicing what I preach, I had to take a hard look at all the kid crap paraphernalia. After having a long talk with myself, I realized that no amount of fancy educational doodads will increase my children's IQ or make them a better person. At the end of the day, a lot of it comes down to genetics. IQ and personality are both highly heritable. As much as I'd love my children to be the next Einstein, I also have to realize that it's most likely not in their genes. Yet, it also means that more than likely, they will have higher than average IQ's just due to genetics (average is 100, if you graduated high school it jumps to 105, graduated college & it jumps to 115). There goes worry number one that I won't have smart kids. Genetics generally say otherwise.

Then there's the developmental factors. Genetics is just a portion of the picture. Often to achieve our "full potential," we have to be in certain circumstances to increase the likelihood of bringing out a trait. And this is where the toy companies get you. However, what they fail to realize is that every child will utilize toys and items in different ways. Some children are more predisposed to be creative over being analytical, so a toy made to enhance mathematical understanding may not even work for that child's inherent learning style. See where I'm going with this? Not a single toy will achieve everything for everyone. But now you're thinking what the companies want you to think--but what if it can bring that out in my child?! I had those same thoughts too.

But I got over them. How? I took a look around the world and throughout history. My own father who grew up with very, very little (especially in the way of toys), grew up to be a highly intelligent man. If you look around the world and you make the assumption that toys lead to greater intelligence, would you then say that people in South America or Africa are less intelligent because they have less stuff to enhance their natural abilities? I'm guessing we can all agree that conclusion is a bunch of B.S. There are just as many intelligent people coming from less than there are from countries that have more. Thus meaning, the amount of educational crap you fill your house with probably isn't going to do much to educate your children over any other child worldwide.

And from that conclusion is how I am getting rid of the majority of our boys' educational gadgets same ol' toys. Those three ride on toys can help their gross motor skills, but so can tumbling and jumping off their beds. Those toys that supposedly increase reasoning abilities can also be created from items in the recycling. Why house a small library when you can just go to one and return the books when your child tires of them? There's really just no need.

Our kids will turn out fine with three toys or three hundred toys. No amount of coercion and promises from "educational" toy companies will change my child's genetics or make them something they are just not.

So what to keep then? That's up to you to decide. We still have the play kitchen, trampoline, ride on toys, and a whole Expedit bookcase full of toys. Could we deal with less and still have happy, educated children? Absolutely. However, it's a process. The boys are involved in every de-cluttering process. Noah generally decides what stays and what goes. I often find him telling me at stores that he wants to get rid of ALL of his toys just to get one toy. One of these days, I may just take him up on that offer. Plus, I often find that they play with the simplest toys--hand tools, balls, sticks, every item from recycling, sheets, and painting/drawing items. For now, we'll take it a day at a time and hope we come to a place where the boys still have enough to keep them busy playing, but not too much where toys are left to collect dust.

For those already concerned that their children will complain about getting rid of stuff, let me give you some hope. I have seen a significant increase in playing when we have less toys out. I believe that the more you have, the more overwhelmed a child can get. There are too many options. When there are less options, the boys seem to find more creative ways to play and utilize items more. Just some food for thought for those wary of my claims!

What's your toy strategy like? Have you also been susceptible to all of the educational claim of toys? I'd love to hear your experience and ideas!

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Progression

Well, it's official.

We are owners of a new (to us) couch. And that old sectional is with a new loving family. Our house could now be called bare to most. To me, it's near perfection. If you're new to minimalism or are just on a path to paring down, I'd like to share our progression.

Stage 1: On a bad day...

No surface left uncovered

Stage 2: Bookcases gone along with a lot of other junk

Stage 3: The here & now. Emptiness.

Big difference, right? Some may be thinking that there's a lot of "dead" space. However, what I see is a place...

- For impromptu dance parties
- To stick dog crates for animals using us as a temporary house
- Full of running Wild Boys
- To hold handstand contests
- Allowing creativity in any art medium
- To host friends and family for parties
- With almost nothing to trip over
- That lacks surfaces to house items that should've been put away the first time
- Void of items needing to be put away or cared for

Now that I can breathe more easily, how's your house coming along? Are you in decluttering mode? What does a minimalist space look & feel like to you?

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Want to type-talk some more? Find me on Google+, Twitter, or FaceBook.

If you like what you're reading, care to share? Feel free to snatch the URL and paste where ever you'd like.

When Family Time Ain't Worth It

I'm warning y'all that this may come off as a total bitch-fest. But this is something I just don't understand.

The topic of my confusion--why families with young children choose to travel.

Firstly, I have to say that if you have the time, resources, and patience to travel with small children, by all means, go right ahead. This is not a post against you, but rather my opinion of why I refuse to partake in traveling with children in tow.

Let's begin...

When I was pregnant with Noah, I had dreams of traveling with my son. Taking him to far away lands. Camping in the mountains. Spending less time at home and more time away. Growing up, we rarely traveled and never did so out of the country. I wanted my son to have a better life than me. Experience more. Be well-versed in other cultures.

Then reality of infancy set in. When Noah was four months old, we took an eight hour car ride to visit GraNana. This wasn't so bad. Except for the diaper changing. And lack of schedule. And having to nurse all the time. And the exhaustion. My goals of traveling seemed possible with a little work. A year later, we took the same trip. This time? Not so easy. Keeping a one year old busy in an eight hour car ride was a chore along with keeping him busy in a hotel room and at GraNana's where every surface was laden with breakable items galore. Add to the fact that I had traveled with just my mom, meaning no extra help from Daddy. Stressful doesn't even begin to explain it.

A few months passed, and K-man was born. Soon after, my mom's side of the family held a reunion in Florida. Despite having the trip paid for, I declined. Who turns down a FREE trip?! Me, the mother of a toddler and newborn, that's who. After guilt set in once the rest of my family returned from their glorious beach trip, we decided to take yet another eight hour car ride to GraNana's. Thankfully, The Hubs was able to go this time. And yet again, we welcomed another bout of stress all in the name of family time.

Well, I've decided no more. As bad as it sounds, I'm slightly glad GraNana canceled on us when we were set to journey yet another eight hours to see her this past month. Taking two toddlers with just my mom for help seemed a bit cruel to me. With yet another upcoming family reunion planned for The Hubs' relatives, I've decided to put my foot down. Maybe I'm selfish, but frankly, I'm not one who welcomes any added stressors.

Now, you may be thinking that this may not seem like a "good" minimalist thing to do--avoid family time for selfish reasons. However, I've created a list as to why it may just fit in line with minimalism.

Why We Won't Travel With Toddlers:

1. MONEY. Traveling is wicked expensive. With Keegan almost being two, it would mean four plane tickets should we choose to fly somewhere. Add in a rental car and hotel room. There goes two grand. Minimalism encourages you to spend your money wisely on things you love. A trip is not fun with young children. I'd rather save that dough.

2. STUFF! Ok, so I know there are people who travel lightly with small children. Kudos to them. However, right now, we require at least one crib or pack & play for Keegan. Add in the stroller if we want to walk anywhere (have you seen The Chariot?! That thing is a beast!). If we fly, then we'd need a vehicle, meaning we'd have to bring both boys' car seats. Oh yeah, and the diapers, changes of clothes, entertainment, blankees, etc.

3. SLEEP. The few times we have traveled with the boys, it meant we got little sleep. It takes them forever to calm down at night. They rise early. And forget about naps! When I hear the word "vacation," I envision lots of delicious sleep. This is exactly the opposite of what happens on a so-called vacation with young children involved.

4. MISSING FAMILY. This is a tough one for me. I love being with family. However, I prefer to do so in the comfort of my own city as long as there are wild boys involved. I figure that most of the relatives are older. Thus meaning, they either have no children or adult children. It makes more sense for them to come to us than us to come to them. So if you're a family member reading this, please come see us! We miss you!

5. MEMORIES. I get this a lot. "Don't you want to give your kids lasting memories." Sure. However, episodic memory (memories of events) doesn't usually kick in until at least two years of age, meaning kids will have no memories of such events. Even with Noah having episodic memory, who remembers trips from when they were three? I know I sure don't. I barely remember much before five. Stick that money into savings, spare the stress, and take the kid to the zoo. It will be just as fun as going to Disneyland at this point. When the boys are actually old enough to remember a trip, we may actually consider going somewhere.

6. FUN FACTOR. Let's be real. When you travel with small children, or any children for that matter, vacations are usually planned around activities they want to do. When I go on vacation, I want to do things that are fun for me. Such things as staying out late, sleeping in, hiking, action sports, and general young adult debauchery. Even with family to help babysit, you never get out of parenting when the kids are with you. Plus, the idea of walking around Disneyland all day makes me want to saw off an arm. It's already become an agreement that my parents will take the boys to Disneyland, while The Hubs and I can go on the real rides at Six Flags. I'm just so not a fan of kid stuff. Period. And thus, what grandparents are for!

This is by no means an extensive list. Just a quick list to give family when they start to yell at me for being lame and not going anywhere.

How about you? Do you/have you traveled with young children? Did you find it stressful? Or are you like me, and avoid traveling with small children as if it were the plague? Let's share!