How the Grinch Stole Halloween

You're a mean one, Minimalist Mommi.
You won't give kids candy.
You're a grump at Halloween.
You are nothing but a Grinch.
Minimalist Mommi!

Cue musical interlude here.

Can you tell that I'm not a big fan of Halloween? Well, this wasn't always the case. In fact, I used to look forward to Halloween every year. I had a dedicated pillowcase for candy. Over-thought costume ideas all year long (the best over-thought one? A dead punk rock cheerleader). And I was such a trick or treating addict that my mother made me sign a legally binding document stating that, at 15, this would be my last year of accumulating mass amounts of candy for free. I think I came away with twenty pounds of candy that year.

So if I was such a lover of a glorious free holiday, why do I despise it so much now as an adult?! Oh, where to begin! I think once I became a poor college student, I wasn't a fan of feeling like I had to buy candy to hand out to kids who didn't need it. I'd rather be eating that candy myself. Candy glutton, thy name is Megyn. Then The Hubs and I went through a pretty religious phase where Halloween was evil. Wiccans practicing their faith en masse a solitary day per year. The devil's work! Once we came back down to reality, I started considering why we celebrate anything. What are the origins? Why are these traditions important? I couldn't come up with much for Halloween. Generally, trick or treating was done by the poor in return for prayers or to appease the dead to keep them from harassing the living. Knowing this, I didn't see much of a point in my kids taking part in such an activity. We didn't need to barter food for prayers and had no concern of paying off the dead with candy. So why take part? Tradition! Said in my best Fiddler on the Roof impression.

Tradition. Everyone is big on good ol' traditions. Myself included. Once we had these kiddos, our families were quite unhappy with our choice to avoid Halloween. "But it's not religious," they touted. "They're so cute in costumes," they begged. "Think of all the candy I could eat," I pondered. But three years came and went. No Halloween for us.

Since The Hubs has been getting more lax on these sort of matters, I convinced him to allow the boys to trick or treat. Be part of the system/peers/country. Slowly, he agreed. What he wasn't so happy with was that I would not allow the boys to trick or treat for candy. "What's the point then?! Can't they have ANY fun?!" he angrily asked. I was confused. He wasn't a fan of participating in Halloween, but as soon as I mention doing it for a cause, I'm the bad guy?! I didn't get it. But again slowly, he came around and agreed it would be okay with him. He was working that night anyhow, so it's not like he would have to help out. My Grinchy heart was opening.

Now, I'm sure you're all wondering what's the deal then. Why no candy? Here are my reasons:

1. Most candy is full of crap I don't want in my kids' bodies or in anyone's body, for that matter. Even organic candy is full of sugar. Toddlers + loads of sugar = pure chaos. To help other families avoid such a scenario, we are giving out temporary tattoos and stickers.

2. Gluttony. There, I said it. Most I knew when growing up were competitive with how much candy they could gather. This event is more about who has the most and less about the experience. I'm trying to avoid teaching the boys to "keep up with the trick or treating Joneses."

3. Trash. All of those miniature candies come with a lot more trash than food. And those little wrappers are far from biodegradable. I'd like to not add to the problem under the guise of tradition.

4. Expectations without work. Trick or treating implies that you complete a trick in order for a treat. Heck, we make our pets go for this. Operant conditioning. On Halloween, kids just expect that they should be able to knock on anyone's door and be handed a treat for no reason other than that they look cute. What is this teaching kids? That they are owed such things because it's a certain day of the year? I remember trick or treating and being mad when a house wouldn't answer or lights were off. Where was my damn Reese's cup?! I really don't want my kids to grow up with that sense of entitlement that I had.

5. The fair-trade debate. You see, most chocolate companies do not purchase fair-trade cocoa. Thus, most of the chocolate being handed out comes from child-labor. So little kids are put to work so that more privileged kids can go door to door and demand yummy treats harvested by the poor kids. Doesn't seem quite fair, does it?

With all of the Grinch-esque beliefs around trick or treating, why did I fight to participate? I want my kids to have a fun life. I want them to feel included and not ostracized for being "different." And really, kids are freaking cute in their little costumes. Even I still love to dress up. But the best part? Getting to know your neighbors. It's the one day of the year where people are friendly and talk to one another. Granted I wish this happened more frequently, but I'll take one day over zero days.

So what is our plan if I'm so anti-candy then? We are trick or treating for non-perishable items to donate to the trusty food bank. The boys (ok, Noah) will have small little fliers to hand neighbors about our quest. My sister will be pushing the boys in the chariot while I pull the wagon of donated goodies. To give the Elephant and Dragon/Firefighter (waiting to see what he'll put up with) some incentive, they know that they get to pick out their very own treats once done. To Whole Foods we shall venture for fair-trade, allergen-free, reduced to no packaging deliciousness.

Morality and ethics in hand, we shall conquer Halloween.

What are your thoughts on Halloween and trick or treating? Are you participators or Grinches? Let's share!